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Role Reversal: What happens when the woman is the bread winner?BY: Jessica Parker | Category: Men | Submitted: 2010-02-26 10:52:31
It wasn't too long ago that the standard American family had a husband who worked full time, and a wife who stayed home to take care of the kids and house. Since that time, though, American families have undone many changes in each family member's role. Women are no longer expected to stay home with the kids. In most families, both the husband and the wife work. In 2009 and 2010, American unemployment rates reaching 10% nationwide and higher in some states like California. The immediate effect of this is obvious: greater financial need and less spending. For many families, though, it also means having to get every member of the family adjusted to new roles. Before I continue, I want to acknowledge that I am entering into forbidden waters. There is a high likelihood that by continuing this line of thought I will be considered backwards, uninformed, and maybe even gender biased. I am hoping that no matter what your thoughts on the feminist movement are, you can hold on to hear my line of reasoning and the examples from real life that have led me to these conclusions. Okay, enough with the caveat. Men have long been seen as the primary providers for their families. There is sense of responsibility that men tend to hold based on this understanding. For many men, being able to provide for the expenses of their family is not only a responsibility, but a privilege. This feeling may stem from primitive times when men were responsible for the safety of their family. Instead of having to ward off wild animals or competing societies, men are now faced with the responsibility of warding off debt collectors and repo men. No matter the cause of this feeling, men who are faced with a layoff often find themselves at a loss for how to fill their new position in the family. If the wife is working and the husband isn't, does that mean that the traditional "female" roles are now shifted to the man? While this may be primarily just an issue of availability (if one spouse is working and the other isn't, it makes sense for the spouse who isn't working to take charge of the household needs), it carries with it a stigma that many men aren't ready to accept. When your family is faced with this situation, it is important to remember that what the man is doing is just as important as how he feels about it. Keep lines of communication open so that expectations and frustrations become clear before they become major issues. You should also have regular discussions with your spouse about how they are feeling about the current situation; while feelings should not dictate every decision you make, they do give you a good starting point for understanding one another and making sure needs are met. Men also tend to respond well to words of affirmation; if you are doubting your own worth, spend a few minutes thinking about the things that you have accomplished for your family and for others recently. Wives and children can help with this by intentionally sharing the thoughts they have when they appreciate something the man did. When it comes down to it, your family will make it through this challenge only when you are assured of your love for one another. Article Source: http://www.writearticles.org/ About Author / Additional Info: Jen, http://www.jenhurst.wordpress.com Comments on this article: (0 comments so far)
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